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Monday, June 22, 2009

Please excuse my absence once again.

As some of you may have heard from twitter or via facebook, my Grandfather is very sick right now. He's struggled with Alzheimer's for years now and has been in a nursing home for the majority of my children's lives.

Last week I got a phone call from my Mom letting me know that he wasn't doing so good. He's now got pneumonia and they don't think he's going to last much longer. Our plan was to head up to this weekend coming up since hubby had a 3 day weekend but plans changed. Mom didn't think that he was going to make it that much longer, so I packed up myself and the girls and we headed up to Canada yesterday.

I got a chance to go by the nursing home to visit before we hit my Mom's house and I just feel so sad about the entire thing. He's not responding much anymore, not speaking, he's just lying there as a vegetable. They no longer have him on medication for the pneumonia, they just have him on some morphine and oxygen to keep him comfortable as we wait.

My biggest issue, and they say this is the most humane way to do this, is that they're not feeding him. No nourishment whatsoever! He can't swallow, I know this, but they're not feeding him through a feeding tube or IV or anything, just keep pumping morphine in him so he's not hungry. As my mom said, she feels like she's committing murder and I agree. It's just frustrating to watch him in so much pain.

My oldest daughter hasn't seen him since she was just a little over a year old, she talked to him for a while, drew him a picture and had some 'sadness' in her eyes as she said "I'm going to miss my Great Grandpa when he dies". How do you respond to that? She just hugged my mom. I feel so helpless. Mom has been staying overnight at the home almost every night and last night she said he's now starting to feel cold to the touch. It's hard to see this happening to both my Grandfather and Mom.

So I'm here till about the 29th of June, please excuse my absence, I brought my laptop but am not sure exactly how much I'll be able to be on and blogging. I thank you in advance for all the thoughts and prayers that have already been said and for those to come.

10 comments:

Leslie said...

I am very sorry to hear this Gina. :( Keeping you all in my thoughts.

RobynsOnlineWorld said...

I'm so sorry Gina. I know how hard it is to see them like this. Sending lots of positive thoughts for you and your family to get through this rough time.

The Mind of a Mom said...

My hear and thoughts go out to you and your family. I know this is a nutso time, but if you want to garb a coffee let me know
Hang in there

Storm, The Psychotic Housewife said...

Hugs to you! I'll keep your family in my thoughts.

clenna said...

I'm so sorry for your grandfather's illness. It's very sad and very hard for the children. My grandson asked me the other day if I would die someday. I told him yes, it's the cycle of life. He said he would be very sad. I told him it was ok to be sad for a little while but I want him to be happy and remember the good things about me and the good things we did together. I had to really emphasize that life goes on and it should. I would never want him to continue to be sad. Whew - what a conversation we had. Good luck to you.

Leane said...

There is nothing to be said that will take away the pain, but do know that there are people who have never met you or your family that will pray for you and always wish you the best. I am so sorry to hear of your struggle and hope that you can somehow feel peace in this time of turmoil. Best wishes.

Nessa said...

So Sorry sweets. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

taysmommy said...

I'm thinking of you all mama!

Definite (((HUGS))) to you!

Petula said...

Gosh, I am so sorry to hear that. I know it's a tough time for you, but you try to take it easy and be there with your family. Don't worry about the blogging.

I can so understand how you feel about them not feeding him. Take care. {HUGS}

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